What Does Being Bisexual Mean? #1 Guide for Men

What Does Being Bisexual Mean?
The Spectrum of Attraction: Understanding Bisexuality.

What Does Being Bisexual Mean? Defining Bisexuality

Understanding bisexuality can be a journey, not just for those who identify as bi, but also for their loved ones and allies. If you’re a man navigating this path, you’re not alone. This article aims to shed light on the multifaceted world of bisexuality, offering insights and dispelling common misconceptions.

For many men, bisexuality is still a confusing and murky concept. Bisexuality means having an attraction to or being interested in having sexual and romantic relationships with more than one gender. Specifically, someone who identifies as bisexual is attracted to both men and women.

Bisexuality is not the same as being gay or lesbian. A gay man is attracted only to other men, while a lesbian woman is attracted only to other women. Bisexual individuals can be attracted to both men and women.

Bisexuality also does not mean that someone is attracted equally to both men and women. Some bisexual people prefer one gender over the other, and the ratio of attraction may vary over time. The intensity of attraction may also fluctuate. The bottom line is that bisexual people can connect emotionally and physically with more than one gender.

Key Aspects of Bisexuality

Here are some critical things for men to understand about bisexuality:

Bisexuality is real. Bisexuality is a legitimate sexual orientation, not just confusion or experimentation. Men who identify as bisexual are attracted to both men and women and should be recognised as such. Their identity is valid.

Bisexuality is not a phase. While sexuality can be fluid for some people, bisexuality is not just a transitional phase before identifying as gay. Bisexual men remain attracted to more than one gender over the long term.

Bisexual men are not secretly gay. There is an unfortunate misconception that bisexual men are closeted gay men who are afraid to come out fully. This is not true. Bisexual men are attracted to both men and women, not just men.

Bisexual men do not need to “pick a side.” Some people expect a bisexual man to settle down with either a man or a woman eventually. But they can certainly maintain relationships with both genders over time.

Bisexual men are monogamous when committed. Bisexual men are capable of monogamy just like anyone else. If they are in a monogamous relationship, they remain committed to that one partner.

Bisexuality does not make men greedy or unfaithful. Being attracted to more than one gender does not mean bisexual men are any more likely to cheat. They can be just as committed to monogamy as straight or gay men.

Bisexual men do face discrimination. Since they do not fit into the gay or straight binary, bisexual men can unfortunately face discrimination and misunderstanding from both heterosexual and homosexual communities.

Bisexual men can feel torn between worlds. Since they straddle straight and gay communities, bisexual men can sometimes feel like they do not fully belong or fit into either world. However, the bisexual community provides a group where they do belong.

Coming out is challenging for bisexual men. Coming out is difficult for anyone in the LGBTQ community, but bisexual men sometimes face extra hurdles. Some keep their orientation private to avoid discrimination from both heterosexual and homosexual communities.

Bisexual men have varied sex lives. Bisexual men do not need to be concurrently active with both men and women to identify as bisexual. Some may be in monogamous relationships with one gender. Some may go through periods of only dating men or only dating women. The key attraction remains.

Bisexuality and sexual health. Bisexual men should consider getting routinely tested for STIs to protect their health and that of their partners. Using condoms, dental dams, and other forms of protection is also essential.

Bisexuality and masculinity. Some people incorrectly assume bisexual men are somehow less masculine than straight men. This is an offensive stereotype. Bisexual men span the same diverse spectrum of masculinity as straight men.

Bisexual men can live happy, fulfilling lives. Despite facing discrimination in many societies, bisexual men can and do have happy, healthy lives. As with anyone else, self-acceptance is an essential first step. Connecting with the bisexual community also provides support and a sense of belonging.

Beyond the Binary

At its core, bisexuality is the capacity to be attracted to more than one gender. This encompasses a spectrum of experiences, from equal attraction to both genders to varying degrees of attraction across the gender spectrum. Bisexual individuals can date and fall in love with people of any gender, regardless of their own gender identity.

Think Beyond Labels: Remember, bisexuality is a personal journey, and every bi person’s experience is unique. Labels like “heteroflexible” or “homoflexible” might be used to describe specific experiences within the bisexual spectrum, but ultimately, the individual’s self-identification takes precedence.

Misconceptions and Microaggressions

Unfortunately, bisexuality often faces misconceptions and harmful stereotypes. Some common myths include:

Bisexual people are just indecisive or confused. This invalidates the authentic experiences of bisexual individuals and undermines their sexual orientation.

Bisexual people are secretly gay or lesbian. This erases the distinct identity of bisexuality and reinforces harmful binaries.

Bisexual people are more likely to cheat. This harmful stereotype is not only untrue but also perpetuates negative attitudes towards bi people.

Microaggressions, subtle yet hurtful comments or actions, can also be a reality for bi men. Be mindful of your language and avoid phrases like “You’re not bisexual,” “I thought you were with [gender of previous partner],” or “Pick a side already.”

Supporting Bi Men

As a man, supporting the bi men in your life can make a significant difference. Here are some ways you can be an ally:

Educate yourself. Actively seek out information about bisexuality from reputable sources.

Listen without judgement. Create a safe space for bisexual men to share their experiences and feelings without fear of being invalidated.

Use inclusive language. Avoid gendered assumptions and respect the pronouns of bisexual individuals.

Challenge harmful stereotypes. Speak up against biphobia and educate others about the realities of bisexuality.


Bisexuality is a valid and natural sexual orientation.

Bi-men deserve respect and understanding.

Being an ally is an ongoing process.

Myths and Misconceptions

There are many myths and stereotypes about bisexual men that are harmful and simply not true.

Myth: Bisexual men are confused or in denial about being gay

Many people believe that bisexuality is just a transitional phase before fully coming out as gay. However, research shows this is not the case – bisexuality is a valid sexual orientation on its own.

Myth: Bisexual men are inherently unfaithful

There is no evidence that bisexual men are more likely to cheat than men of other sexual orientations. Faithfulness depends on the individual.

Myth: Bisexual men must have both male and female partners

Bisexual men, like anyone else, may choose to be in monogamous relationships. Having partners of multiple genders is not a requirement.

Myth: Bisexual men spread HIV/AIDS

This harmful myth associates bisexuality with disease and irresponsibility. In reality, safe sex practices are essential for everyone regardless of orientation.

Diverse Experiences

Bisexual men have diverse experiences when it comes to realising their identity, coming out, relationships, intimacy, and sense of community.

Realising You Are Bisexual

For some bisexual men, discovering their attraction to multiple genders is a gradual process over months or years. Others may have a sudden “aha” moment. There is no one way this self-discovery happens.

Regardless, recognising one’s bisexuality often brings up feelings of fear, shame, or isolation initially. Having community support makes acceptance easier over time.

Coming Out

They are coming out as bisexual, which can be difficult due to a lack of social awareness and negative stereotypes. Without visible role models, some bisexual men struggle to feel confident and proud of their identity.

Some choose only to reveal their bisexuality to certain trusted people. Others are openly out in all aspects of life. No right or wrong way exists – people must determine their comfort level.


Like anyone else, bisexual men form relationships based on mutual love, respect and communication with their partners.

For bisexual men paired with women, disclosing their bisexuality can be complicated by fears their partner will no longer trust them or find them attractive. However, open communication builds stronger relationships in the long run.


Bisexual men enjoy many forms of physical and emotional intimacy. Research shows most bisexual men have more experience with women but also desire intimacy with men.

In one study, the most common sexual activities bisexual men engaged in with male partners included kissing, mutual masturbation, oral sex and frottage.


Building community with other bisexual people helps overcome feelings of isolation. However, bisexual men sometimes feel unwelcome in both straight and gay communities due to harmful myths painting them as untrustworthy.

Online groups provide valuable support and friendship for bisexual men. In-person meetups, activism groups and Pride events also help bisexual folks celebrate their identity and build community.

Explore More on BisexualMen.uk

What Does Being Bisexual Mean
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For those who wish to delve deeper into the world of bisexual and bicurious men in the UK, BisexualMen.uk offers a comprehensive and welcoming online portal. This platform provides more than just information; it’s a gateway to vibrant communities, unique experiences, and safe spaces for exploration and connection. Discover a variety of established businesses and events tailored for bisexual men, from luxurious saunas to intimate cinema clubs. Embrace your journey of self-discovery and community connection by visiting BisexualMen.uk.

In Summary

Bisexuality encompasses attraction to more than one gender, fluidly and to varying degrees. Bisexual men form meaningful relationships, enjoy intimate connections, and build community while confronting harmful myths about their identity.

As understanding of diverse sexualities grows, bisexual men empower each other to live openly and authentically despite the negativity they may face. With compassion and support, bisexual men can proudly embrace this part of themselves.

In summary, being bisexual means having the capacity to be attracted to both men and women. Bisexual men deserve to live authentically and be accepted for who they are without judgment. While facing misunderstanding and discrimination, bisexual men can have fulfilling relationships, good mental health, and live satisfying lives by embracing their identity. The bisexual community provides invaluable support and a sense of belonging that all people deserve to feel.

Frequently asked questions

How does bisexuality differ from pansexuality?

While both bisexuality and pansexuality involve attraction to more than one gender, bisexuality typically refers to attraction to both men and women. In contrast, pansexuality is the attraction to people regardless of their gender. Pansexuality is often described as being attracted to the person, not the gender.

Can bisexual men have preferences for one gender over another?

Yes, bisexual men can have preferences for one gender over another. Bisexuality encompasses a wide range of attractions, and it’s common for bisexual individuals to experience varying degrees of attraction to different genders at different times.

Is it necessary for bisexual men to have relationships with both men and women to be considered bisexual?

No, bisexual men don’t need to have relationships with both men and women to be considered bisexual. Bisexuality is about the capacity for attraction to more than one gender, not the requirement to be involved with multiple genders simultaneously.

How can society better support bisexual men?

Society can better support bisexual men by educating themselves about bisexuality, challenging stereotypes and biphobia, and creating inclusive and accepting environments. Support also involves recognising and validating the unique experiences and challenges faced by bisexual men.

What are some common challenges faced by bisexual men?

Bisexual men often face challenges such as biphobia, bi-erasure (the tendency to ignore or deny the existence of bisexuality), and misconceptions about their ability to be monogamous. They may also experience a sense of not fully belonging in either heterosexual or homosexual communities.

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